15 May Update

Hi all,
Again a delay due to poor Internet connections. Aunty Saiatua (Sina's sister) returned to New Zealand to take her daughter Valeti back to school and see her family .. she will come back. Appreciate their support over the past 5 weeks - especially Sina having a sister to turn to - Hi to the family in New Zealand.

Tae again fluctuates through the day from extreme pain and discomfort to a few hours where she can ride in her wheel chair. We notice the clearing the lungs in the morning is becoming more of a challenge. I am amazed with her attitude through it all as her body seems to be switching off and she loses more function. She takes it so well - and once the pain subsides, she is back to the smiling, cheeky daughter. I am often overwhelmed thinking of what she is going through on a daily basis and can only put the chirpy attitude down to the prayers of so many of you. We like to quote the sufficiency of God's grace and here we see it, even through the fire.

Last night Tae spoke of her constant exhaustion - just too tired. She wants to go home - to heaven and finding living tough. She wrote the following on her journal:

I've asked God for peace...
So why am I still feeling this way?
I thought dying would be "peaceful" and (while living) an opportunity to relax and have time to just appreciate everything while you can.... but right now, I just feel "exhausted" with my life .... I feel tired

At one point, I even wanted to got to heaven straight away because of how I was feeling. Dad told me God has a reason for everything and I'm sure there are still more things that I haven't done yet. But even thinking about that makes me feel tired and overwhelmed, like I just can't handle or do it. Like there's just so much to be done ...too much to be done.

Its not like I haven't enjoyed life... I mean, Ive always thought positively about such things -
thru the fears & thru the fire... through the doubts and sorrows...
This is probably just a phase that will soon pass (me feeling this way)

I guess everyone feels tired of life every now and then..
For now, Im just going to stick to Dad's advice and thrust God on this one...
God hasn't failed me before and I am sure He never will!

Thank you for your love and prayers.

Comments

[Lepeka]

Thank you Uncle Taholo & Sina for sharing God's blessing via Cuz Tae with all of us. You two have done a perfect job in raising her up! When she writes a journal like that, it is from her faith and I take it back to you both and raising her up with such an incredible faith.

'Ofa atu Cuz Tae and indeed, your Dad is right (as they always do) - things happen for a reason!

Wishing you one of the Best SAPATE TAMAI ever Taholo. God's first gift to you as a Daddy (Tae Jr) is with you and we are always grateful for that. (Sorry Sina, but was unable to wish you one last Sunday but I trust you had the Best SAPATE FA'E with Tae Si'i and glad knowing Satua was there - as always - 'e tauhi 'a ta'okete kia tehina.

Malo fau 'a 'ene 'ofa.
Our love to the rest of the fambam please.

(PS: Great seeing Baby Rosa is growing up...talavou e ta'ahine)

With our prayers
Sela, Tupou, & Lepeka

[Lisa, Lama and Micah Sione 'Alofi]

Indeed you are here for a reason Tae... I read all these posts and see how God continues to bring people to your door so they can see the reality of life and faith in a living God. What it means to have a personal relationship with Him, not just religion! I teach at Bethlehem College in Tauranga, NZ, which is a Christian School and I have shared your story with lots!
You have touched so many Tae and will continue to.
May this passage of Scripture be an encouragement to you:
Isaiah 40:28-31 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of hte earth. He will not grow tired and weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord wil renew their strenth. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
May this indeed be your reality Tae, even as you face the deterioration of your body.
We continue to pray for you Tae and your dear family...
'Ofa lahi atu mo e lotu,
Lama, Lisa and Micah Sione 'Alofi

[Lata]

Dear Tae,
Isa dear little one...you continue to be an inspiration to so many...and will always be...lots of lolomas from Fiji XOX

['Una]

Dear Tae,

you have inspired our lives the few days we shared singing and playing guitar or just chatting and yes you still have a lot to inspire...'Ofa lahi atu ka koe Tae and we could understand the pain and hardship you carry along each day...thanx for still " holding on.. walk on walk strong" We pray that God will grant you PEACE each day..hope TAholo will have a blessed father's day and especially to you sharing the father's day with your dad...'ofa atu to Sina, MIa and Joy

with love and prayers

POla, NOa, Malia, Nane, Suli, MOne, Kipola, KELisimi, FElix, 'Una
Laucala

[Kava Tulua]

Hi Little Tae,

I love you Little One!!! You're Amazing!!! You all are truly Angels!!!

'Ofa lahi atu,
Auntie Kava ;)))

[Murray Doehler]

Dear Tae:

On Wednesday (May 14)I had worn a golden tie, to remind me of the light you have brought to all of us. I had also worn it because we had not heard anything and hoped you were still giving us light.

Yesterday (May 15) we celebrated my daughter's and my nephew's birthday (they were born the same day, but five years apart). The posting was, as usual, a gift to us all.

Today is casual day and no tie. Just as well because we are having glorious weather of full sunshine. Tomorrow it is supposed to rain, this just makes us appreciate the sunshine even more.

Keep on shining!

Murray

[Nesi and Seni]

Dear Tae

I read that almost every great saints in history went through a time of desert experience in their spiritual journey. They called it the "dark night of the soul." During those times, God seemed to be so inattentive, uncaring, and unreasonable. They prayed but it seemed their prayers just hit the ceilings. They felt as if they were on their own and God seemed not to know what they were going through. Only their faith carried them in such time. They trusted in the midst of the seemingly meaninglessness of trust. According to traditions, God allowed his closest friends like Job to go through it like walking alone through a long dark tunnel except for that dim blurred light at the very far end beckoning the tired traveller to keep on keeping on.

Perhaps you going through such time. I pray that God's grace will keep on encouraging your heart...that your trust will remain strong even in the midst of excruciating pains and deep confusions.

Truly, there is no night without a morning, no cross without a crown,no pain without a meaning.

May God be more real to you than ever before.

'ofa atu moe lotu

Nesi & Seni

[Mona]

Lots of love to you Tae. Your strength is amazing. You make me believe in all that is good.

Love you lots,

Mona

[Saiatua]

Hi all,
We miss you guys,...Valeti is still talking about almost everything that happened there.She told Vai that she's coming back soon with Mum.Sina,ma omi pe mo Valeti fai pe tangi he ta'efie ha'u mo e 'ofa atu kia Tae.Ko ena na'a ma o 'o pick up e faito'o he Tokonaki pea mau o 'o 'ave kia Pesi,pea u 'oange kiai e CD koee na'e 'uluaki 'omi 'e Taholo (with only 3 songs in it)fiefia e fefine mo talamai 'e toki 'oatu he vaka 'aneuhu ke mo toki pick up 'auhu.'Ikai ha me'a lelei ko e fakamuna pe 'e Valeti 'i loto ke toki tufa atu 'e Mia kia Adeliene,Moala,Mia mo Kaunga si'i mo Joy.Ko e ki'i kofu pe ena 'o Tae pe 'e sai'ia ai ko e vala mafana pe taimi ni he meimei 'u fale.Ki'i kofu pe ena ne ma'u...mo e stickers 'a Tae meia Sione Latu.Mau sai pe,momoko he taimi ni.Te ma toki o 'auhu 'o 'ai me'a 'i Onehunga ke 'oatu pea manatu'i keke ta mai ka fefe 'a Tae,mo 'ikai to e kai.'Ofa lahi atu ki hono mata mo e tui falala,kataki mo e lotolahi 'oku ne ako'i 'aki 'eku mo'ui.Valeti did a little reflection about our visit,but mostly about Tae.I was surprised to see her standing up and talked without any fear or nervous.So thanks Tae,if it was not for you she wouldn't do it.Vili is more focus in his studies...'Isi on his rugby game and Mahe on his Basketball's,and he's talkin g about playing rugby as well but I told him not to...Valeti went to her Girls Brigade prog.this evening and Sione was doing his homework,,,. ..He is still Sione..he reminds me of Joy everytime he talks.We all love you Tae,and the rest of the family.Kei fai pe lotu,pea te tau toe fe'iloaki pe e.'Ofa lahi atu kia Tae,Taina,Sinisa,Latu mo e toenga kotoa e kainga hena.Love,Saiatua & Valeti

[mele kainga kava]

God Bless you Tae!

much luv
mele